oh my word.

oh my. almost a month has passed again on me, where does the time go?! jeesh. well. since the last blog. i've gotten a new job, olivia is now 18 lbs & 29 inches, eating solid foods, screaming up a storm (and i mean screaming), snugglebutt turned 6!!!, his spooky costume party is this weekend, snugglebutt has also started fall soccer & kindergarten, my beloved* is still working the crazii schedule of the overnight life, and i have begun enjoying the part time working mom life. jeesh. a lot has been going on. olivia is getting so big on us so fast. watching snugglebutt age & grow didn't seem to be so abrupt but looking back on his pictures & what he looked like three years ago when i met him (omg! this winter will be three years, jeesh) but olivia just keeps growing longer & longer it seems everyday. i don't like it at all. i want my teenie tiny baby back. altho she is a lot easier & more fun now, i want my little peanut back. i guess we're just living life. things have been going swimmingly. but the crazii season has begun for us. it begins at the end of august. we have three kids' birthdays in the family, then snugglebutts, then a bunch of the adults in the family, olivia's & the holidays. is it new years yet? LoL happy thursday everyone.

pain in the butt networks

so these "social networks" that are suppose to help us stay in contact with people from our past, relatives, etc are really beginning to get on my last nerve for a number of reasons. people that cry/b!tch/moan on these websites about how it's raining or their baby daddy is a dead beat really are killing me. okay obvious if you have a "baby daddy" rather than your child's father we understand you are not together anymore or is your favorite person because you're not giving him a name & i find that "baby daddy" is always a negative phrase, so please why do you need to continue on with a huge b!tch-fest about why he sucks. really? we all have our issues & at one point you liked this guy enough to allow him to donate sperm & give you your wonderful bundle of joy, so shut it. another reason being these little girls with their inappropriate pictures, words, sayings. okay i shouldn't even say little girls here because their are women my age or older that are doing the same thing. granted i say curse words on there & have pictures of drinking that aren't appropriate as well but these girls are putting things on here that i would imagine they wouldn't pull out at a family reunion & let their parents, brothers, uncles, etc see or hear them why is it okay online? people take these websites too seriously. there was life once before these websites people, do we remember this? or has our brains been so fried from starting at the computer screens so long we can't remember that far back? another reason linking into the last reason, but if something happens outside of these websites it is either plastered all over it or you end up being deleted as a friend. yes i understand these websites aren't that serious, i just stated that. but if something happens with other parties that you had no knowledge of, weren't actually involved in (unfortunately you are in a round about way but didn't partake in the actions) why does it need to involve you on the internet? seriously. another one! grow some balls, i am just as guilty for this one. but if you have something to say, say it!! i call my version "venting" because i am surrounded by some people who can't handle me just being blunt and saying what i mean when i mean it. things need to be "PG-d" down or wait until the others involved calm down because they can't handle too much at a time. blarg! people and these websites are so frustrating. if i didn't have my little lady & family all over the world who have yet to meet her, i swear i'd just delete it & be done with them all. so frustrating sometimes, the things you need to read.
also. i pulled something in my neck at work today so i am a little testy from the soreness & inability to turn to the right completely. boo to stupid whiplash.

to perm or not to perm?

that is the question. please, any hair dressers or anyone with experience in perms please assist with this. i am a serious chicken when it comes to extreme changes. i did it once with an at-home kit & it came out fairly nicely but i wanted it out faster than i adjusted to it. so i ask,
to perm or not to perm?
i won a gift certificate for a good amount of money to a really nice salon & figured i'd snag the opportunity to do something big (costly) since i wouldn't do it on a normal basis. so should i just get my blonde blonde back or should i try a perm again?

question for the parents.

okay parents of the blogging world, i need some perspectives on a subject. olivia rose* has been a terror all week, she's teething so she's miserable. but that isn't the topic today. i had finally settled her down last night, literally got to put her down in her swing & walk away for a minute. so as i did that & walked outside for a smoke (yes, i smoke i know i know it's my vice) but anywho. so i am on my way out & a few people come over. i say please excuse me for a minute i'll be right back, if olivia isn't her usually perky self please don't mind her she's teething & has been a crank all week, but i just settled her down so please leave her be. well!!! i come back in five minutes later to hear "olivia sit down, oh man i can't back her back in" so i admit i did charge forward & push the person out of the way a bit, saying ok i got it i'll get her back in, person was persistent in helping so i continue with i got it leave it it's okay. i then ask, why did we take her out of the swing, did she spaz out? i am answered with oh no she just wanted to hold her. WHAT! so after i tell you not to take her out of her swing, you just take her out hand her off to someone i don't know & none of you wash your hands & i know that they smoked as well before they came in & THEY DIDN'T WASH THEIR HANDS. so i got pissed. i picked up olivia, changed her in her bedroom, put her in her walker in the kitchen (the people were in the living room) and washed OTHER PEOPLE'S DISHES YET AGAIN! i wasn't rude, two of the people were chit chatting about a resume but the third talked to me & olivia & of course i wasn't rude & talked back. so the friends per-seed to leave, we say goodbye, she thanks me for letting me hold olivia HEY SHITFACE I DIDN'T LET YOU YOU GUYS HELPED YOURSELF. i of course didn't say that. then one of the people come back & said i didn't mean to upset you, we just wanted to hold her. i said that's fine i wouldn't have had an issue with her holding olivia she takes care of kids but you didn't ask her you just helped yourself & you never do that so all of a sudden people come over & you do, none of you washed your hands & had come in from smoking & you know i want everyone's hands washed before holding her, and i had just said that i had settled her down to leave her be. i mean it's a common courtesy to just listen to what the mother says or at least ask before you just do it. well! then this same girl proceeds to text my beloved* while he is at work saying that she was really sorry didn't mean to upset anyone & that i had embarrassed her? really. fcuk that. you never just pick up my kid, you never touch her cause you don't wash your hands, i don't leave her alone with you & leave you incharge of her ever and now all of a sudden there are people here & you wanna act like olivia is a common sharing piece of furniture? really. i was furious & honestly don't even give a shit anymore if i upset or embarrassed her. i mean i tried my hardest not to be rude, or mean (cause apparently i have a mean side to me) but just to say my point & leave it at that. but now! now because you are a huge pussy & can't say something to my face and because you cry to my beloved* about something that doesn't involve him while he's at work i could care less about your fcuking feelings. i am sorry, but parents out there am i wrong? i'm not looking to keep olivia in a bubble, people can hold her & such but because of her whole episode at birth since the day she came home, NO! before she came home & we were still pregnant we made it pretty clear we wanted people to wash & sanitize. i mean we have at least one sanitizer bottle in every room, the truck, diaper bag, all of the carriages. can we get anymore clear than that? shit. i guess i just want the respect of being asked before you manhandle my kid. blagh. so that was my thursday night, how was everyone else's? i am so over this little episode, they can dwell on this shit but i will not but the next time i will not be so poliet or quiet about it, i'll really embarrass their skanky asses.

so this is my first time blogging from my phone, exciting* so I was just wondering if other parents out there get bummy. I mean we work, take care of our little ones, our homes, loved ones, attempt at having social lives . .. .its hard. I know we all get burnt out but do any of you get bummy? I mean, I love my daughter, she is the light of my life I could be in tears & her smile/laugh will cheer me right up & make me forget about the rest of the world but then she naps or runs off to play & I'm back to me & my thoughts. I love my life, don't get the wrong impression. But being run down, hot & sweaty can equal bummy? Right? Blah. I'm working again so maybe that's what it is, separate anxiety, working 6 days a week sucks period but leaving my little one behind makes it worse hopefully this schedule doesn't last too much longer. Blah. That's all I got, blah. This weekend we have exciting plans for the kids both weekend days, some of which includes family* which I'm wicked excited about. My parents have become super busy in their older years LoL don't tell my mom I said that. To the weekend!

i want my baby!

so this week has been my first full week back to work, since my little peanut has been born. i know, it's been 8 months & i was lucky enough to stay home with her that entire time. i wanted to work, i wanted to get out of the house, have a few extra dollars to help out my beloved* & be that much more comfortable. i am only working part time, literally three minutes from my house and it's an easy, fun job. but the way my schedule is it has me working six days a week, for four or five hours, i think i have one six hour day. i am enjoying it. i work usually 11-3 or 4 & olivia rose usually naps around noon til 3 sometimes a little off that schedule, but i'm not missing too much. i do work one night & a mid shift but last night & tonight my little lady is staying with her nana & papa, my parents. so i am missing her like crazii. yes, everyone has told me it gets easier & i need the me-time. i'm not complaining about work in any way shape or form, i wanted to work, i did this myself. but i miss her. i miss her like crazii, while i'm working i miss her, but it's not that bad cause obviously i'm busy & going, but the second i come home & she is sleeping or not here, i am like baby girl! come home to muma. arg. i guess i was just looking for another outlet to get this separation anxiety out, my beloved* says it gets easier & reminds me why i'm working but it's tough on a first time mom. i just want to snuggle her up & never let her go. i don't think i will handle pre-K & kindergarden day one drop-off well at all!

when is enough enough

so my question for today is. when do you just say enough is enough?
we all have enough one our plates; we have kids, families, jobs, lives, so when do you say okay this has gone on long enough & being the "adult" or "being the bigger person" is just enough. i mean, yes, if you "be the bigger person" they say you win because you were strong enough to be better than others. but with having a life, commitments, responsibilities adding up when is it like okay you need to grow up as well & do your half. i would love to be able to go into detail about this topic but of course the whole allowing people into your life & putting it all out there sometimes isn't the best idea. anyone can come onto any website at any time & read this & figure out what you're talking about & in the end it isn't worth it. but when is it? when is it the time for the bigger person to just be like "listen, i don't mind continuing as is but i need a little help from the other end" that is my question. i don't mind playing housewife, mom, babysitter, laundry lady, working mom, housekeeper, peacemaker, party planner, the one who worries about what will happen if we do this, i sometimes enjoy most of these things but when is it my turn to be like "fcuk it, i'm taking the day off from it all" i need a vacation; mentally, physically & emotionally. but that is off in the far distance for me at this time too much going on, coming up. birthdays, parties, holidays, just began working again, things need to get done. but that day will come & those at the other end of my little fit i can promise will not be happy campers. and of course i don't want to come across the rude, mean b!tch that i know i do sometimes but a girls gotta express herself and after holding things in for so long it probably will not be a nice little sit down conversation. oh well.

(just to clarify, i am extremely happy with where my life is. i love my family, friends, working but there are certain aspects or people that just make things a little more difficult. if some people would just lend a helping hand or keep their crappy, debbie-downer mouths shut that would be just as helpful) happy hump day fellow bloggers.